For 20 years I ran from my pain. I hid, stored and took on the weight of the world. I believed that if everyone else was happy, I could be happy. I put others needs before my own and deep down I didn’t feel worthy of happiness. Through a mountain of childhood trauma I stopped trusting God. At 14 after begging God to save my mother, she died of Ovarian cancer. I decided in that moment that I had to control my way through life, it was my only option. 60 days after my mother died my dad remarried, and we were not allowed to say our mother’s name in the home. I was drowning in grief, and I didn’t have anywhere to put it. I was taught the only way to deal with my pain was to ignore it and move on. Overnight life went from a light-filled childhood to a daily fight against darkness. I felt deeply abandoned and afraid of life. I didn’t have the tools to process my pain so I created a pattern of hiding my feelings. I didn’t want to bring heavy grief around my family and friends so I created two worlds, my inner world and my outer world. I didn’t let anyone all the way in. I felt alone most of the time. I told myself I wasn’t supported and I believed that story. I was living a lie and the heavy load I was silently carrying got heavier and heavier. I became codependent in my relationships. Doing my very best to make others happy so that could I feel happy. I developed a savior mentality. Thinking it was my job to save the people I love from pain. By age 20 my pain felt too much to bear. And in the moment I needed it the most, my heart and my sister guided me to massage school. The doors to my soul’s path flung wide open and I didn’t hesitate to jump into the healing waters. I immersed myself in the work of the Healer. I practiced 20+ modalities and learned how to intuitively listen to my body. Over the years, I expanded my tools and my practice in esthetics and nutrition. I had a hunger to help myself and others heal. At 21, I moved in with my father to intentionally restore our relationship and in the process we became best friends. I forgave him and allowed him to show up for me again, and that he did! At 27 I became a mother and my purpose on this earth became clear. Being a mother to my 4 babies is what I value the most in this life. I know I was made to be their mother. But being a mother without my mother here triggered all my mother wounds to resurface. One year after my first born Phoenixx came to me, he developed a severe respiratory condition and I found myself once again on my knees begging for God to save his life. Through grace, I found doTERRA essential oils and our lives were drastically changed forever. My son’s body began to heal and my support system grew. I found a community I had always dreamt of, and I experienced massive expansion in all areas of my life. The Dream weaver within me was activated and the impossible became possible. But my pattern of running from my deepest root pain was still keeping me out of body, mind Soul alignment. I didn’t know how to show up for myself, I didn’t feel worthy to put myself first. I became workaholic, a sugaraholic and a shopaholic. There was no room for error, I was a perfectionist and beat myself up whenever I got the chance. I drank caffeine like water, and I was always on the move. I lived on the surface and projected my pain onto others, thinking they were the ones that needed healing, not me. When I was with my family, I wasn’t present with them. My relationships with my husband and children were desperate for change. When my mom died I had taken on the responsibility for my little brother Steven. I did everything I could to make sure he was taken care of. When Steven became addicted to drugs, I blamed myself for his pain and I punished myself for years. I have seen Steven at the depths of despair, with nothing left to his name, and living on the streets. I feel a part of me lived on those streets with him. I searched for over a year looking for my little brother, I prayed that strangers who came in contact with him, were kind and would know his heart. I suffered with him. And I tried to fix the pain for him, but it didn’t work. When I was 35 my dad died from a 4 year battle of cancer. The devastation that followed almost broke me. Not having control of his fate, I found myself collapsed in a massive burnout, feeling like an orphan. There was no more running for me, only surrendering. The same year my dad passed, I had a faith crisis and let go of the religion I had been devoted to for 35 years. I didn’t know where I belonged anymore. I was completely uprooted in every aspect of myself. I was questioning who I am and why I am here. We move to Hawaii that year and with all the courage I could gather, I turned and looked at my mother’s spirit and asked her to lead me out of the pain. For 25 days I cried out the grief. I felt the emotions that I thought at one point would kill me if I allowed myself to feel them. The wound is where the light enters. -Rumi I got to the other side and in the process I restored my trust within. I forgave God and I forgave myself. Soul truth was born to help me know myself at a Soul level, and to stop looking for answers outside myself. God gave me a process and then asked me to share it. I am here to break patterns, deepen Soul alignment and create a new way to grow abundance with self-love as my very foundation. This process has reminded me of my innate Power, the Power I was born with. I now know the Divine has got my back and always has. Any pain I have ever experienced has been for my growth and my soul’s purpose. In my healing process I realized I had abandoned myself. I thought I was protecting people I love from my pain but really I was protecting myself from being seen. I now see myself. And I love myself enough to allow others to see me. I healed the wound within me that believed I had to do life alone. I opened myself up to support and I now receive God’s love and support every day, through so many that serve the light. We were never meant to do life alone, we were designed to heal and grow together. After a year of my Soul guiding me through a process that we now do in PWR91, Steven and I were reconnected in a whole new way. He was in prison doing his work, we talked on the phone every day for almost 3 years. I looked forward to every single call so much! I could’t wait to deepen in my Spiritual process with him. We were guided back to each other at the perfect time. Steven is a miracle to me and has created so many miracles in my life since returning home. I guide PWR91 because it helps me stay aligned and stay true to my highest path. I guide because it wildly supports my children for them to see their mother practicing self care, meeting my needs and speaking my truth. I can now authentically teach them how to do the same. I guide because it lights me up to see others stand in their light and because living in union with God is where I experience the deepest level of joy. Every day I do a trust fall into God’s hands as I say Martin Luther King’s words, use me God use me. I believe in miracles and the amount that go down in this process make the power of God undeniable. ENLIGHTENMENT IS WHEN A WAVE REALIZES IT IS THE OCEAN. -THICH NHAT HANH I feel honored this inspired process came through me and Steven. It has literally saved my life over the last year as I took the scariest step of my life. I know more than ever, I can trust myself and everything is happening for me. Even when life is more uncertain than ever, I am certain in myself. We are surrounded by grace. God is in every detail of our lives. Through our mind, body and heart we align with the light. Alignment work never ends. Pwr91 will facilitate massive growth in you. It will push you, challenge you, and wake you up to your greatest potential. I’m so grateful to be apart of this collective work.